with green wheels, on the bus to Denver.

I follow her to the bathroom, admire her sideways as I enter the marble stalls. Mentally rewrite the scene in which I ride down the driveway in Kansas City, fall on my ass after two seconds, never climb on top of a skateboard again.

She wore a studded belt low across her skinny hips. On the bus, I was just reading the summer 2008 issue of Ms., the article about body image. I was that skinny once and I wouldn’t mind being that skinny again.

I think of it as a matter of determination, not poor body image. A matter of how many huge salads I can eat before I have to splurge. Can I eat enough raw food to get down to 125 pounds again? Just for the thrill of being back there before I turn 50?

Deprivation is so last century—
it’s what we eat, not how much.

Leave A Comment

  1. BernardL June 15, 2009 at 6:31 am - Reply

    The weight battle is a war that can only be lost and requires unending vigilance. 🙂

  2. Beth Partin June 15, 2009 at 9:08 am - Reply

    Bernard, I’m kind of enjoying it this time around.
    .-= Beth Partin´s last blog ..Downtown Denver Restaurants: Appaloosa Grill =-.

  3. Cara Lopez Lee June 21, 2009 at 4:10 pm - Reply

    Black girl with skateboard with green wheels… an image that makes me yearn for a moment from my youth. I’d like the thrill of riding a skateboard one more time, even weighing 20 pounds more than I did back when I sped down hills without a thought for breaking my neck.

  4. Beth Partin June 21, 2009 at 5:08 pm - Reply

    Only 20 pounds! I’m pushing 40. Sigh.
    .-= Beth Partin´s last blog ..Crazy About Denver: How the Garden Grows =-.

  5. Cara Lopez Lee June 21, 2009 at 5:32 pm - Reply

    Where do you hide it? In your big toe? I don’t believe you, so don’t bother trying to convince me. You must have been a stick figure as a young wanna-be skateboarder, and it was probably just a stiff breeze that knocked you on your ass.